ARTICLE (13) "THESE SHOES WERE MADE FOR WALKING"

“These Shoes were made for Walking”

Growing up in the 1960’s on a farm deep in South Westland it was normal for children to go everywhere bare foot, including to school. Shoes were only worn to go to church once per week and to town once per month.

I cannot remember my first pair of new shoes as my mother had a system. All new clothes were bought for my eldest brother.  They were then handed down when he had outgrown them. (I was number five in the hand–me-down line). Once I complained that, I had outgrown my shoes but was informed that I had to wait another couple of months until my eldest brother had outgrown his shoes before the line could move.

I think the first pair of new shoes I ever owned were in fact tennis shoes. Our school principal, who had just moved from the city, declared that all children had to wear white tennis shoes during Wednesday afternoon physical education classes. The only brands available at that time were Barter Bullets and All Stars. Tuesday after school time was dedicated to cleaning the canvas with a type of white liquid that left ones hands white and smuggled everything they touched. Unlike modern shoes, these shoes lasted for years and were usually retired to the bach where they terminated their lives being used to walk around the rocks at low tide.

Today you can buy tennis shoes to practice almost any kind of sport. My cousin once decided to give sky diving a go and to celebrate his first jump ever, bought a new pair of very expensive tennis shoes. The moment he jumped out of the plane, however one shoe fell off.  It was last spotted plummeting towards earth, never to be seen again!

Like most women, my wife has a love affair with shoes. I do not know how many pairs she possesses, but it is a lot! She stores them in their original boxes.  When we got married, she ceremonially divided our wardrobe into her side and my side, but as the years passed, I began to complain that her shoeboxes were beginning to encroach on my side of the wardrobe. We negotiated an agreement. For every new pair of shoes she bought she had to throw away an old box. The agreement seemed to be working well until one day I accidently knocked over one her boxes. To my surprise, it contained two pairs of shoes, as did all the other boxes I subsequently opened.  When I asked my wife about this, she told me that she had been fulfilling her side of the agreement. For every new pair of shoes she bought she was throwing away a box. Our agreement had not explicitly stated that there had to be a pair of old shoes in it!

I must give my wife credit sometimes for her ingenuity in relation to shoes.  Once we were invited to a wedding for which my wife bought a new dress. After traipsing through at least 100 shoe shops looking for a pair of shoes to go with the dress, (without success), my wife hit upon the perfect solution. She bought a can of silver spray paint and when we got home painted an old pair of shoes she already owned. Her shoes were a success at the wedding. Other woman wanted to know where she had bought them. The only problem was that when she took off the shoes that night she discovered that her hot feet had caused the paint to liquefy and seep through the leather. During the next week, she had to hide her perfectly painted silver feet.  

I know of someone who got dressed one morning without turning on the light. After breakfast, she headed off to a two-day planning meeting at her work. Half way through the morning, she suddenly realized she was wearing two different coloured shoes. At lunchtime, she made feeble excuses as to why she could not lunch with her coworkers, and rushed off to buy a new pair of shoes.  That night she arrived home relieved. No one had noticed her mistake. The next morning the meeting continued. She could not help observing however that everyone seemed to be smiling. After about 10 minutes, she suddenly realized that all her coworkers were wearing shoes one of each colour. It took some time for everyone to stop laughing.

Mix up of shoes seems to be a more common than one would expect. A friend of mine was recently at the airport very early one morning and noticed a woman wearing a beautiful pair of boots. The only problem was she must have had two pairs very similar as one boot was blunt nosed and the other was pointed toed.  I can imagine how the woman must have felt when she discovered her mistake as what has motivated me to write this is the fact that tonight when I was taking of my shoes I discovered I too have been wearing shoes from two different pairs and have been doing so for the last two days. I wonder if anyone noticed!

TO PRINT